Creating a Safe Space Within Yourself
A big part of healing and recovering after traumatic experiences is having a safe environment to do it in.
Safe spaces come in many different forms, but in this post we're going to talk about how you can create your own personal safe space- one you feel comfortable to express yourself in.
When recovering, the memories and experiences are a part of your heart that is completely raw, tender and unfiltered.
While creating a physical place to go where one can feel safe is important.
The best safe space a woman can have is the one within herself.
"The space is always safe because you are capable of creating the secure environment for yourself to show up fully, regardless of who's around and how they feel."
Sometimes, in casual day-to-day situations, questions come up- I have to be able to talk about what happened, or at least answer the question. The person asking most likely has no idea that their question asks a whole lot more than they realize. They have no idea that said question rocked me to my core.
The risk of being vulnerable, sharing those past experiences and difficult memories can make us feel isolated and alone in a way that shatters us.
It's easy to feel that maybe the person asking doesn't truly have an interest in what you have to say, There is a way to calm yourself on a deeper level. Speaking openly and honestly, even when the story is uncomfortable and the pain is still fresh, is being true to yourself.
The space is always safe when you hold it fully for yourself.
Answering those tough questions and working through your grief, allows you to see who really is worth having walk beside you and hold your hand through the worst of it. Sometimes people aren't capable of doing that or they just don't want to.
The important thing is that YOU are capable of holding space for ALL of yourself. Allow yourself to feel safe exactly where you are because you the the truth of your experiences and journey. It's okay for you to feel exactly how you feel at any given moment.
You are capable of having complete love and compassion for the pain and mistakes, as much as for the joy and successes.
When you are on YOUR side, the space within you is always safe.
Stand confidently and lovingly exactly where you are in your journey to recovery, no regrets or defensiveness. The first step is to stay true to yourself.
When you learn to love yourself, you learn that you're whole, beautiful and complete- even without another person's justifications. It's easy for us to put too much pressure and expectations on other people to make spaces safe for us... but, the truth is, the physical space will never feel safe if you don't feel safe within yourself.
It's easy to be our own worst enemies, but we have the ability to be our own best friend, number one fan and cheerleader. That's a choice we need to make within ourselves, sooner rather than later.
I created a safe space within myself by allowing myself to forgive the really bad choices and hard experiences. I hold a safe space for myself and I own every part of who I am and where I've been. Life is much better when you are on your own side. The more we own and love and hold a space for the person we are in each moment, the more able and willing the people around us are to help.